Psalm 25
Sunday, June 11, 2006
All Verses here are awesome!! These verses strengthen me so much when I am down or guilty ot sad or mad. I like them so much. You gotta read this!!
Anyway, I still have no idea of where God brings me to. I have no idea why He put me in such a huge battle like this.
# 1 battle
I am still struggling in loving my roommate as genuinely as possible. I want her to not feel alone and left out anymore, but the fact is I am also the one who leave her alone. Well, I think I tried my best to be there for her, to accompany her and to assure her that she's not alone..that she matters to me. However, she doesn't seem to remember all these things that I said. It seems that her pains are covering her ears and heart from receiving the love that other people give. Yesterday night, I read a book called "the naked soul". There I found that there are 2 types of people: other-driven people and inner-driven people. In her case, she's a other-driven people. She becomes whatever she is because of other people. She gets hurt, she closed her heart because of what other people did to her. It's really hard, I have to admit. I want her not to feel that way, but what should I do? I prayed for her and surrender her to God. I put my hope in God alone, cause I trust Him. I might let her just go to SF and become whatever she might be, but I believe so much that God will not do that. God will always love her and want her to go back to the right path. I know really well that God wants to heal her heart. So, I just put everything in God's hands, for I know He's gonna do the best!! Yes, Lord?! AMEN.
Battle #2
I know that L, my other best friend and the only one whom I can share everything to, she wants to go back to Indo and stay there forever and not to come back to Seattle. This is really hard for me. I kinda worry to whom I should tell my stories and feelings if it's not to her. Man...this is really tough. Not to mention I might not be crying on the day she's leaving...it's like..u knoe..when you don't cry when one of ur bestfriend leaves, it seems like u don't really care for her. well, i admit that i'm an ignorant person,but they're still precious to me. I don't want to be an "I, I and I person"...I want to care for others...coz that's what God tells me to do...so help me Lord...
Battle #3
I don't know why, but now...I don't feel good...Lol..well, it's not about feelings though..God give me the peace...give me the joy..I want this day to be Your day and I want this life to be Yours forever. All of my hope is in You...Jesus Christ take my life, take all of me....The world is too big for me to understand and God's plan is even much bigger for me to understand...
