Hmm...interesting..yet annoying. My trueself. In You, Lord. You, Lord, who brought me here, up til this point, You are the one who brought me here. Will You leave me at this point. I know You won't. You are not like other people, You are not merely human, You are GOD, LORD, JESUS, Maker of everything, You are BIGGER and MORE than anything else I know.

I don't want to compare You with other people in this world, even with the most respectable people ever. I want to abide in You today Lord. I want to focus on You again. After a while, I have been so busy with my own work, been so busy with my schedules, been so swayed by the holiday mood, but I want to keep my fire burnt again, lord, even bigger and hotter.

Lord, I am writing this, not so that other people can read and know that I am religious or somewhat like that. What's the point of being religious if I lose my soul? What's the point of getting people know about me, while I am not being REAL with You???

Look, I know I have been so silly. My anger, my pride, my self image, everything about me that I can never think about that doesn't please You. I am sorry. Lord, I want to repent. I want to change and I can't without You. Yesterday, I just realize that You are my HOPE. Without You, I can never live the same. You have never disappoint me. All the grades that I got, it's all because I did not study too well. You helped me, a lot, already, and yet I am not thankful. Lord, teach me how to be thankful. Teach me how to be grateful.

Lord, I am not talking to myself right now! Forgive me for all my sins. Forgive me for all the 'intentional' lies in order to keep me away from problems. Forgive me for everything. Talk to me, Lord.